Firestorm**
I.
Monday, October 9, 2017
my 92-year-old grandmother
his family of seven
a single mom with two young boys
awakened by a tree crashing
wind howling, dog barking
smoke alarm blaring
a neighbor banging frantically on the front door
got out of bed at 1:30, 2:30, 3:30 AM
opened the curtains & saw from their windows
ashes floating, fire twisting
metal & hot swirling winds
the hillsides orange, vineyards aglow
massive gusts blowing
the sky a red inferno
embers raining down
within moments a wall of fifteen-foot flames
her backyard burning, his apartment ablaze
their mobile home engulfed
the house filling quickly with thickening smoke
power lines falling
horns honking
to evacuate ASAP
no warning, no news, no internet
twenty minutes, fifteen minutes, two minutes
just enough time to get dressed
put on flip flops & flee
grab car keys & ID
prescription medications
a pack of diapers & pair of shoes
his false teeth & reading glasses
the dog, three cats & seven chickens
their nine-year old twins & son with special needs
his elderly aunt, in pajamas & slippers
her newborn daughter, only four days old
—nothing but the clothes on their backs
the raging brush fires ripping falling trees
thick smoke blanketing closed-off roads
flames skipping over the highway
by hurricane-force 50-mph winds
Larkfield-Wikiup, Mark West Springs, Coffey Park & Fountain Grove
a war zone
Journey’s End mobile home park
burning to the ground.
II.
Everything left behind
tuvimos que evacuar nuestra casa sin podernos llevar nada
not knowing if she would ever again see her home
ranch house, mechanic shop, wood shop
art materials & curriculum
college textbooks & golf clubs
trucks, trailers, mowers, blowers
a car their cousin bought a week prior
gear from our annual camping trip
a new pair of boots he didn’t get to wear
cute bear slippers & brand new bike
treasured mementos collected since childhood
uncle’s safety box with his life savings
thousands of dollars in inventory
grandfather’s engraved ring—irreplaceable
tools collected over three generations
family photos & home videos
every dance recital, school play, gymnastics meet, volleyball game
birthday parties & baby showers
his current works, her past triumphs.
III.
Just one of thousands of unfortunate families
generous, kindhearted, fun-loving, hardworking
who gave so much support & service to the community
always willing to put others before themselves
a caregiver for the elderly
animal rescuer, recovery coach
incredible musician
youth director at our church
volunteers at a local art center
a tireless cardiac nurse
security guard, often taking double shifts
ran a home daycare—main source of income
a local middle-school teacher
teaches children with special needs
principal at an elementary school
dedicated their lives to rehabilitating youth
countless hours coaching the high school dance team
aspiring athlete, avid fisherman
florist, roller skater, punk rocker
lifelong welder struggling to provide for his family
works for the US postal service
for the city street department
started his own plumbing business
does carpentry and construction
always there when you need her
going above and beyond
—brave local heroes, endlessly sacrificing
Korean War veteran, disabled Air Force vet
retired firefighter, peace officer
PG&E first responder
paramedic out helping others while his house burned to the ground
an entire career helping other people, asking nothing in return.
IV.
Reestablishing themselves with limited resources
already living paycheck to paycheck
enormous bills & deductibles
lost their source of income
staying with family, starting from scratch
a makeshift home in the living room
a fold-out bed
the long road ahead
the slow process of starting over
an intimidating endeavor
without work, a long waitlist
navigating FEMA & federal aid
managing insurance claims for adjusters
updating the mortgage setup
working with the home owners association
all the agencies we need to notify
no renter’s insurance to replace their personal effects
still making payments on what is now rubbish
invested her life savings
nothing to fall back on
grandpa retired, unable to work
on disability, grandma severely injured
need immediate help to make ends meet
basic necessities, simple things
socks & underwear
winter shoes & jackets
diapers, wipes & onesies
toiletries, a place to store them
please help ease the burden, replace field gear
uniforms & equipment, tools for work
clothing, appliances, pet supplies, computer, cookware, furniture
an air purifier for respiratory problems
a down payment on an apartment
case management services & mental health counseling
employment & rental assistance
funds to rebuild their home and their lives.
V.
This home they worked so hard for
a fixer-upper bought two years ago
a six-month remodel after flooding last Christmas
every weekend spent renovating
their beautiful custom-built dream house
new roof, new kitchen, new fence
a nursery for their soon-to-be baby boy
brothers married in the backyard
with a garden to love, where the dog could run free
a longtime home of 11 years, 19 years, 30
years of cherished memories
this safe haven—hub of our extended family
once a friendly subdivision
completely leveled, perdimos todo
within minutes—unrecognizable
y no solamente nosotros, si no que muchos vecinos también
entire neighborhoods incinerated
nearly 6,000 structures destroyed
just one of hundreds decimated
reduced to rubble by the ferocious blaze
the indiscriminate fire took all of our belongings
everything amassed over the course of their lives
everything ever saved as special & meaningful
gone just like that—in the blink of an eye
perdió todas sus pertenencias
nothing was spared, treasures lost forever
emergency cash savings
burnt ashes beneath our feet
all that remains is the foundation
bed springs twisted, a few trinkets
a single family heirloom
two teacups from her grandmother
all that’s left is a lonely chimney
a mailbox standing in the driveway
the pomegranate bush & garbage cans
remnants of a life lived.
**Author’s Note:
Each phrase in this poem was compiled from nearly 500 GoFundMe campaigns following the 2017 California North Bay fires. Among these anecdotal appeals to assist family, friends, coworkers and neighbors, there often followed a sequence to the storytelling: how each escaped, where each lived and worked, and what possessions each took, left behind, needed, lost, and found. Every narrative was individual, every loss personal, yet this pattern accumulated into a collective story of a community. This poem is my attempt to measure the magnitude of the devastation.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Nicole R. Zimmerman is a Sonoma County writer obsessed with the meaning of home and the significance we assign to personal belongings and other prized possessions. She holds an MFA in Writing from the University of San Francisco. Her work includes a Pushcart nomination from the South Loop Review as well as essays and reportage published in newspapers, anthologies, and literary journals such as the Los Angeles Times, The Best Women’s Travel Writing, Creative Nonfiction, and Origins Journal.